Neo Uchiha Sasuke
by AURyuichi-san
Summary: A Naruto fan is entirely unamused at the irony of being born as one of the characters she hated the most, that character being the traitorous bastard Uchiha Sasuke. Well the new and improved Sasuke was certainly not going to go out of her way to act like that brooding douche. The ninja world will just have to deal with a less back-stabbing Uchiha brat. -Rated for future chapters.-


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

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><p>Oh gods. This was...I didn't even know how to begin describing how horrible this was. I was reborn as an Uchiha. And not just any Uchiha. THE Sasuke Uchiha! What the fuck?! Sure I was a Naruto fan. Sure I had wished to go to the Naruto world at one point or another. It was kind of a given, but I would have preferred it as myself, a GIRL in her late teens NOT AS UCHIHA SASUKE! I DIDN'T EVEN LIKE SASUKE! The arrogant little snot always pissed me off. Seriously, from the get go I hated his asshole personality and only hated him more when he turned traitor. And please with the pity, that only made my opinion of him worse seeing how he handled everything.<p>

Okay, so maybe I was being a bit unfair considering how emotionally detached I am from people so I wouldn't even have bat an eyelash if my family, immediate or otherwise, had all been killed off in a single night considering I wouldn't listen to all that Nazi-like Uchiha propaganda nonsense Fugaku no doubt forced into Sasuke's impressionable, malleable little mind. Okay, again maybe exaggerating a bit again as I would probably shed a _few_ tears for this second mother, Mikoto, since she seemed a perfectly loving mother until the end though I have no idea if she actually agreed with that stupid coup d'etat.

Then again, I may only feel a bit of sadness since I still have my memories of my previous life, not just my emotional capacity and I don't really see any of the Uchiha as family and am detached; except for Itachi of course. _Of course _Itachi had to be my favorite character of all time, just a bit ahead of Kakashi because of his capability to be a total martyr for his cause and not completely be held back by his emotional baggage. _Of course _Itachi had to be the only Uchiha that I managed to see as family because of how much of a perfect brother figure he was to Sasuke, so _unlike _my own previous brother figure that taunted me, put me down, robbed me; Itachi was willing to kill his family, his clan, on orders of his village, even his lover, but the one thing he loved more than the village, the one person he _would not_ kill, was Sasuke. And now I was Sasuke. That alone brought on such an intense rush of poignant and loving emotion in my chest that it _ached _every time I thought on the sacrifice he made, the sacrifice he was _going to _make. The worst part of it all was that I couldn't do anything to stop it.

By the time I was old enough to do anything about the coup, the clan would already be dead set on their plans and Itachi will have attained the mangekyo sharingan because of his inability to save his best friend Shisui from Danzo's machinations. Itachi will have already become a double agent for the Akatsuki by the time he was ten, the same year he became a chunin; I, as Sasuke, would only be five years old by then. Itachi didn't even graduate from Academy until he was seven and even Kakashi had barely graduated from academy at five and that was during war time. I doubted I could be prodigious enough to graduate Academy as early as Kakashi or even Itachi, and what difference would a fresh out of the academy genin do in the grand scheme of things?

No, I already resigned myself to living out the Uchiha Massacre and watching Itachi destroy himself as he tortured his little brother; i.e, me. I also had no intention of graduating early from the Academy, wanting to graduate with the class of all the other clan heirs. I would have to bide my time and grow stronger on my own as I adjusted to being the last Uchiha left in Konoha in order to prepare myself for the shitstorm that was waiting for me as soon as I graduated just because I was Uchiha Sasuke, and possibly for being on the same team as Naruto if I choose not to interfere with him until 'Sasuke's' supposed to but being on the same team with that annoying, loud-mouthed dobe no matter how well intentioned and determined he was would seriously piss me off, Uchiha or not. Sasuke, after all, hadn't been the only Naruto-verse character to piss her the fuck off with their character, attitudes, or quirks. Naruto's irritating lack of knowledge(though it was partly not his fault), his idiotic fearlessness(which was only useful in life or death situations and completely bothersome otherwise), and his tendency to lash out at Sasuke simply because of their reversed roles(envy and jealously were beneath him) pissed me off to no end. And I couldn't even _begin_ to expound just how prolific my vehement and fervent loathing for Sakura was.

The first thing that turned me off from the girl was her _horrific _pink hair. I _hate _pink, with only so very few exceptions to the rule(cherry blossoms, seashells, pink panther, roses), and having the main female protagonist have pink hair had me immediately scowling in utter _revulsion_. My considerably neutral opinion of her character design(as it in no way affected my opinion of her character) lowered to the negatives when I found out she was little more than a weak-willed, book-worm, poorly trained, slip of a fangirl that practically offered herself to the _painfully obviously _uninterested Uchiha Sasuke despite having been given the extremities of the 'cold shoulder' on every occasion they'd interacted in. Her actions, pointing clearly towards a violent banshee-gorilla hybrid, towards Naruto were absolutely _despicable_. No matter how obnoxious or ignorant someone was, you had no right to treat them like the dirt beneath your feet. Let's not even get started on the others, the only other characters she somewhat liked were Shikamaru and Shino, the others she either disliked outright(Neji pre-chunin exams and Ino), was neutral towards(Lee, Tenten, Choji, Hinata, and Kiba), or liked a bit(Shikamaru and Shino)._  
><em>

I scowled, ignoring the squeal of feminine delight that my 'new' mother, Mikoto, gave as I absentmindedly moved simple puzzle blocks into correct slots or shuffled simple kanji pieces into the correct order or place. Being a toddler had its pros and cons, just like anything I suppose. I could only be grateful that my awareness of somehow being reborn as _the _Uchiha Sasuke came _after _I had gotten passed my diaper-wearing, breast-feeding, baby food, and crawling days. As the title described, I could 'toddle' places as I clumsily relearned how to walk, adjusting to this new male body and relearning how to read and write from my stay-at-home ex-kunoichi mother.

More often than not, my 'new' family found me scowling in irritation and annoyance, rarely showing wonder unless it involved chakra(since any use of it was awesome to me) or nature. Human beings and toys didn't hold my interest for long as neither was challenging to observe or figure out since I had wa~y too much knowledge on most of the people I see and therefore already know them inside out. It's not like me being a little genius did much to impress my 'new' father since being a genius was different from being a 'prodigy.' Just because I was smart, didn't guarantee that I would be a ninja of Itachi's caliber at his age. He seemed to think that Itachi would be the only prodigy born to the Uchiha in a while and so held absolutely no expectations for me save, oh I don't know, _pushing me to be just as prodigious as fucking Uchiha Itachi_. I mean, what the hell?!

I was barely just starting to fucking walk and write and my so called _father_ was already giving me long winded ass speeches about how I had to live up to the Uchiha clan expectations as his son and be just as strong and dedicated as my _perfect_ older brother. No fucking wonder the original Sasuke had such a hero worship and brother complex towards Itachi and such a skewed view of the clan as a whole. Little surprise that Sasuke basically went bat shit crazy when said brother slaughtered their entire clan.

I wasn't about to relive all that, oh hell no. I wasn't about to go and try and save the Uchiha clan from their impending doom either as they all seemed as stuck up and supposedly superior as Sasuke was starting from canon times ten and without the meager conscious that Sasuke had to begin with. Besides I doubt there's anything I could do as a toddler growing into adolescent days that could overly change anything regardless, much less make them completely redeemable after years of fuck-ups from both Uchihas and the village regarding their behavior towards each other so I wasn't even going to try. I was going with Itachi's original plan for Sasuke to make a name for himself as a loyal Uchiha to the village and redeem and rebuild the clan name to a more honorable standing, still hard but much less betrayal and angsting. Itachi even set it up nicely for him but Sasu-gay had to fuck it all up by being all emo and getting obsessed with killing the brother he had a hate/love relationship with which was also pretty fucked up.

There was no way I was growing up to be as crazy and weird as the rest of the ninja and ninja to be in Konoha save for how weird I already was before being reborn and I don't consider being a schadenfreude-ic sadistic mildly insane optimistic realist all that weird compared to all the other fruit loops in the Elemental Nations. Hell, I'll probably be the most normal one among them all save for Ten Ten with her love of pointy things and Hayate who only had that coughing thing and sword mastery going for him. I didn't count Yugao because she's an ANBU and Hana because she's an Inuzuka and has three partners. The rest all had some kind of freaky quirk that made them strange, from a voyeur to a man-hater, most of the crazies were bred in Konoha. Yeah, I wasn't getting anywhere near any freaky quirks with a ten foot pole. I wasn't even going to _think_ about Sasuke's freaky tomato obsession. That was definitely not going to develop in me at all.

My mouth turned into a grimace as my second mother finally pulled me away from the boring toys and proceeded to feed me fruity mush. I also couldn't wait until I could eat solid food again. There was actually a great many things I couldn't wait to do when I was old enough to do them, learning to use chakra chief among them. It wasn't so much learning to be a ninja that interested me, after all it was a give, no I was more interested in learning the more difficult or obscure chakra arts like fuinjutsu, iryo-jutsu, and chakra enhancing your own muscles and weapons like Tsunade and Asuma. _That _is what I was really looking forward to.

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><p>Apparently, using my super baby brain muscles from practically birth had me develop something of an eidetic memory even better than Sakura's and my ability to meditate in my previous life certainly helped with organizing my memories and with chakra control and development. In short, I had a lot of <em>controlled <em>chakra for a kid my age, even for one from the Uchiha clan. Of course Itachi still had more than me at my age so obviously it failed to impress my second father, not that I really cared about that bastard's anything. As I finally grew enough to run around on m own, my second mother not so concerned with me running around unsupervised with all the Uchihas patrolling the village, I found myself spending more and more time learning from iryo-nins at the hospital and devouring any books and scrolls I could find that I found interesting in the academy and local village library and archives.

Of course, I kept most of the things I learned secret from my dearest 'family' as I had no intention of being praised and pressured into succeeding like Itachi constantly was. In fact, only Itachi knew what I was fully capable of as he helped me with advanced ninja training as I was stuck pretending to only be on a slightly above average level whenever trained by our 'parents' or a fellow clansmen. Itachi was very approving and proud that I hadn't taken after the family motto of being total arrogant assholes and having the insight and foresight to see that showing off my intelligence and strength would do my progress to get stronger more harm than good. _He _wasn't unnerved by how wise, intelligent, and so unlike my own age I acted, though I knew for a fact others would, it was why I acted like an arrogant jerk whenever I encountered anyone my age. They were all way too immature and short-sighted for me to try and befriend them seriously. Hell, I'm pretty sure it'll still be difficult to be real friends even _after_ we all graduate from academy. It'd probably take a few years after graduation for me to tolerate them enough to ignore their quirks to become more than moderate acquaintances.

Befriending Shisui was something of a surprise to me. I had kind of forgotten about Itachi's 'best friend' and fellow double agent for ROOT and all that nonsense. Both of them helped to keep me off of Danzo's radar and both knew that I knew as much, knew much more than I let on, but none of us ever brought the fact to light. It would ruin the precocious balance of interweaving plans and schemes if I was brought into the game and I had no inclination of getting myself involved beyond what was supposed to happen to me. Though, Itachi seemed to always appear less burdened around me, not only because we both gave each other the unconditional love of a sibling, but also because I showed silent acceptance and even support to his covert actions, especially after he joined the Akatsuki when he turned eleven.

It was with a heavy heart that I started to slowly distance myself from both Shisui and Itachi, knowing what was going to come in the next two years. Both seemed to understand and were both pained and grateful that I was the one to instigate the action, grateful that they would not have to do it, but pained when I seemed to give a final goodbye to Shisui, correctly deducing that I somehow knew Shisui wouldn't be here much longer. That I didn't give any sort of goodbye to Itachi, rather constantly looking at him with sorrowful, loving, respectful eyes and constantly reminding him that I would always look up to him and respect him, love him unconditionally forever, no matter what, was extremely telling and Itachi wasn't ashamed to admit that each time, he had given me a very strong, heartfelt hug. I wasn't ashamed to admit either that I returned those hugs with just as much emotion as he did.

As far as I was concerned, Itachi was the only Uchiha I would ever love and respect and him committing the Uchiha Massacre would do nothing to change that.

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><p>The day of the Uchiha Massacre really happened when I least expected it. It's not like I knew the exact date it would happen so I couldn't really <em>prepare <em>for it, not that I had anything _to _prepare. Sure I was tense and paranoid for days after hearing the death of Shisui, and I certainly was more loving and supportive and comforting towards Itachi whenever I saw him, knowing he had to witness the death of his best friend, but even then I finally relaxed a little after days of inactivity.

Of course coming back home to dead bodies spread out around the clan compound would probably catch anyone off guard. Despite being desensitized to seeing such gruesome and copious amounts of profusely bled corpses thanks to how projected such things were in the media of my previous life, seeing such things in person and with a short lifetime of ninja training had my senses going haywire. My entire body became on high alert and I was only grateful that I was either wise enough or stupid enough not to allow fear or shock to run rampant in my mind, though I did find myself running home, the only emotion I was really feeling as I passed more and more dead Uchihas, both young and old, is how fucking worried I was over how much of an emotional wreck Itachi must be right now.

I love Itachi, not in a romantic sense, but in a purely platonic and very powerful familial sense. I learned first hand that it was true Uchihas felt love much more strongly than normal people, feeling such a deep and intense loathing towards the ones that caused his suffering; Danzo, the elders, Madara, and Obito; that it frightened me for I have never felt something as powerful and poignant as my deep seated love for Itachi and for that emotion to be so very angry and malevolent was nearly overwhelming, but Itachi came first and my logic came second above all, even my emotions and desires. It was something that came with me from my previous life that I was extremely grateful to keep. I was sure my strong sense of logic and aptitude for wisdom would very much come in handy when attempting to reign in these potent Uchiha emotions.

Though, just for today, once Itachi had accomplished what Obito has expected him to and 'tortured' me, I would allow my emotions to rule. I could already feel somehow that my love for Itachi warring with my hate for those who caused him pain was building a pressure steadily within my mind, the familiar sensation of chakra rushing through my coils trickling steadily into my eyes. Yes, if I let my emotions free for just tonight, I might be able to obtain my sharingan much sooner than others without half as much mental trauma as the them. After all, the sharingan was triggered by strong emotion and as much as Uchiha prided themselves on being cold dickheads, they were ridiculously emotional people and so easily angered and offended.

I _needed _to get my sharingan today. I couldn't wait for the next life or death situation in five to six years for it to happen and I wasn't about to set one up by doing something ridiculously stupid like going into the forest of death before I'm good and ready. I grimaced as I reached my eerily quiet home.

Now all I had to do was face Itachi.

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><p>It had been difficult, unbelievably so, to act as the original Sasuke had when he came upon this situation, to act as if I was shocked, horrified, confused, but I wasn't an Uchiha for nothing and I was capable of pulling off a flawless act for any unwanted audience that might be lurking about. The time spent in Itachi's Tsukiyomi was filled with a very long and heart-wrenching goodbye filled with declarations of platonic, undying, and unconditional love and interspersed with sparse talk of both their plans for the future. When Itachi discovered how much I knew and 'figured out' on my own(I didn't reveal everything I knew, just enough that could be logically deduced from my observations and reading Konoha's historical archives), he somewhat reluctantly(for he did not want to put me in danger) added me to the two person list of those he would report his findings of the Akatsuki to with his raven summons, the other two being Jiraiya and the sandaime.<p>

Of course, Itachi was assured that I would never outwardly act on any information he would give me as I was going to be focusing on getting stronger, building relations in the village, covertly bettering it, and very, very discreetly building up a case or plans on how to have Danzo and his fellow elders defamed enough to be tried and put to death or kill them myself if I feel myself capable of doing it without getting caught, though unfortunately the latter was no more than wishful thinking and a pipe dream at the moment.

After being knocked unconscious by the strain of being under the Tsukiyomi for the first time, despite no torture being involved it was still extremely taxing on the mind, especially when I'm only eight, I found myself waking to the blinding white color of the ceiling to a hospital room. After being evaluated by a shrink, politely questioned by the proper authorities, and given a heartfelt and regretful apology for the travesty of the massacre by the hokage himself, an anbu escorted me to a temporary residence under the care of a much too doting civilian woman that looked in her mid thirties.

It appeared that I would be under her care until both my stupid shrink and stupid doctor decided I was mentally well enough to decide things for myself, like whether I think I'm ready to go back to school and interact with my much too innocent peers and whether I will continue to live with this ass-kissing civilian or choose to live alone somewhere else.

Of course, all adults concerned with my affairs were concerned when I informed them of my decision to go back and live in the Uchiha compound once more, alone, but I couldn't care less. It's not like they would stop me. I was officially the heir of the Uchiha clan and the unofficial head of it as I'm the only remaining loyal Uchiha in Konoha as far as they knew and it's not like they stopped the previous Sasuke from living alone despite being much more mentally unstable than me after the massacre.

At least _I_, the much improved(in my opinion) Sasuke, would be using the next five or so years productively. Becoming a kind and benevolent, but distant, character towards the villagers and a lofty, cold, quiet, and distant person towards the ninja population would be accredited towards the massacre itself and would not incriminate me or make me suspicious in any way. Also taking advantage of what the previous Sasuke didn't and involving myself early in the political affairs of the village since I had a seat on the council and was, by law, allowed to sit in on meetings and give opinions despite not being able to actually vote until I at least become a chunin would go a great way in getting me powerful contacts and allies that could help me bring the main instigators of the massacre to justice.

If I was going to be loyal to this village, which I was but only to the ideal it was built upon, then I was damn well sure going to do my best to get rid of the corruption and clean up the mess left by the elders and the degradation of education and strength brought by peacetime. Sure I wasn't going to bring back wartime protocol for learning, but the standard needed to be raised beyond 'civilians attempting to lower the bar for their own useless children' and producing little more than cannon fodder.

Oh yes, the new improved Uchiha Sasuke had plans for Konoha, and I was positive not everyone would like them.

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><p>It was proof to how apathetic, to how little thought, I had put in my own peer group that I was taken by surprise when Uzumaki Naruto had insultingly challenged me when we were paired to fight as soon as I returned to academy. That I had forgotten about <em>the <em>Uzumaki Naruto himself, the center of the storm that was to come, was an oversight that I was openly ashamed of and was glad for the customary Uchiha mourning scarf(in full black and covering half my face) that hid my grimace of disapproval, at myself of course. I only grew more disgusted with myself when I saw how our peers looked disgusted themselves, disapproving, or openly sneered at Naruto for being so openly insulting to someone who was obviously mourning.

I doubted Naruto was observant or well informed enough to have learned of the massacre yet and I was _positive_ no one had taught(or perhaps Naruto hadn't paid attention or was attending class) Naruto the customary attire that specific clans wore when in mourning. I was livid when I saw the clear signs of the beginnings of sabotage when I saw how absolutely atrocious Naruto's taijutsu forms were and how easily I defeated him by just tripping him. Granted we were both only eight, but I _knew_ that Naruto had the potential to be as strong and intelligent as his father if someone had bothered to properly raise him. I mean his own father had been an orphan for Kami's sake and he still turned out strong and intelligent enough by the time he was a young teen to rescue the kyuubi jinchuuriki from two full grown Kumo ninja. How two Kumo ninja managed to infiltrate Konoha and kidnap their jinchuuriki in what I assumed was war time or very near it was another matter entirely.

For now I was more focused on glowering disapprovingly at my peers as they laughed at Naruto's failure, taunting and jibing at him, making the whiskered blond glare resentfully at me when the stupid sheeple fawned over me and praised my victory. I was sure my standoffish behavior towards them(my ignoring them) only made Naruto resent me more, thinking that I took their acceptance and praise for granted, which I didn't as they haven't accepted me for who I am rather than the last _loyal_ Uchiha.

I knew I had to help Naruto and soon, especially as I discovered he actually had a seat on the council as well being the last Uzumaki in the village and all, but befriending him and helping him right off the bat and so soon after the massacre was too suspicious even for me to pass it off as a desire for bonds after losing my family. After all, why would the top student attach himself to the boy that had heckled him and made a fool of himself since the start of academy? No, I would have to take it slow, become eerily quiet, sit in the back of the class, and simply _observe_. The ninja population, at least the smarter, unbiased, half wouldn't question why I would approach Naruto, the lonely orphan that's labeled and judged for something out of his control. It was too easy to draw the parallels to the recently orphaned heir who was being kissed up to by everyone and seen as the _last _Uchiha rather than as an individual.

No, unfortunately, for me to approach Naruto, I had to be patient. In the meantime, perhaps I could speed up a friendship or two by approaching the two more mature children in my age group, i.e. Shikamaru and Shino. Shino may take a while as the only way to start a conversation would be to bring up bugs and I would need to research for that and possibly even look for a rare one in the Forest of Death to offer and I couldn't do that until I was confident I was strong enough to handle the deadly flora and fauna _and _avoid Mitarashi Anko should she be in there. Shikamaru would be easier as the boy was no doubt already a genius and mature as an adult. All I needed to do was learn shogi and perhaps slip him an IQ test in the form of intelligence puzzles like Asuma did among a few other things in order to give him a puzzle to work with in regards to me, give him something to think about, make him intrigued with me, and set him on the path to discovering some of the village's dirty secrets on his own, preferably starting with why Naruto was loud and stupid and why the village mistreated him so badly. Hopefully, I could get Shino on it too, perhaps bring them together somehow, that way perhaps Shino could keep Shikamaru from being tainted by the village's views of Naruto being a demon as Shino would know what it's like to be prosecuted and judged for something that's been inside them since birth. For as much faith as I had that Shikamaru was smart enough to know the difference between a scroll and a kunai, I was also taking into account the fact that he was still, probably, an impressionable and young eight year old boy, no matter how big his brain was.

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><p>"Oi, Uchiha-san." I stiffened visibly at the address and glared harshly at the one who uttered it, my glare immediately vanishing when I took in the flinching countenance of Nara Shikamaru, Akimichi Chouji cowering behind him, and Aburame Shino standing off to the side, half hiding behind a tree.<p>

"Ah, Shikamaru-san. Don't call me Uchiha-san. It makes me think unpleasant things," like my bastard father and the rest of my bastard clan. "Just Sasuke, no suffixes."

"Just Shikamaru for me then, suffixes are troublesome," Shikamaru drawled lazily as he recovered from the harsh glare, understanding lighting his eyes, but also curiosity at the strangely lacking-of-sorrow from my tone.

"Shika," I replied bluntly, "your name's too long so I'll call you Shika." Shikamaru could only manage a half hearted glare at the girly nickname as Chouji snickered behind him. I gave a small bow to the other two. "Chouji-san, Shino-san," I greeted, rising to give them calculating stares. "What do three clan heirs want with me?" Both Shikamaru and Chouji were surprised when Shino stepped out from behind the tree to join the little group, obviously unaware that he was even present.

"Just Shino is fine for me as well, Sasuke-san."

"A-ah! Me too! Just Chouji! I'm not big on that formal stuff anyways," Chouji added shyly, a stark contrast to Shino's cold, logical tone.

" I only came to ask you about that test you gave Shino and I. I guess he's here for the same reason. I also wanted to know whether or not you know the answers to those troublesome puzzles surrounding Naruto that you led me to," Shikamaru answered me.

Shino adjusted his sunglasses, his other hand in his pocket like usual. "Shikamaru-san is correct. I wish to know the answers as well." Instead of replying, I looked around discreetly, spreading my senses and feeling more than one unwanted listener, though I doubted two of those listeners could actually hear us from that distance. Two he recognized as ROOT that were too far away to hear anything to keep off the two ANBU guarding me's radar and the other two were significantly closer but so lacking in skill it was pathetic, my two unfortunate stalwart fangirls Sakura and Ino.

"You have time to...hang out at my house for a few hours?" I replied instead, pointedly but discreetly messaging Shikamaru and Shino of our unwanted followers. Shika's eyes sharpened before his expression turned lax again and he sighed deeply, looking at the cloudless sky.

"I guess I have some time to kill. Chouji, you can go on ahead, I know your mom is expecting you home soon. Thanks for sticking around this long, I'll be fine." Chouji turned uncertainly to me, looking more than a little frightened. I hadn't realized I was that intimidating to my peers. I shrugged and gave him a reassuring nod.

"No harm will come to your friend while he is with me. I am not some pathetic bully that thinks lording his superiority over others makes him seem stronger," I assured and while the chubby boy looked a bit confused a a word or two I used, he was reassured and smiled happily as he said goodbye to his friend and trotted off. The three remaining only nodded silently to each other before turning to follow me home, the walk there completely silent.

* * *

><p>"Nice training room you've got here. No doubt it's been soundproofed or has some other counter measures against eavesdroppers if you specifically brought us here," Shikamaru commented as he followed me to the floor, slumping down and resting his head on his hand, Shino sitting stiffly in comparison next to him. I only nodded in confirmation.<p>

"Aside from my useless fangirls and obligatory anbu guards, there's a third party in Konoha that has made it their business to always know my whereabouts and actions." The two nodded in understanding, but surprised me with their next chorused word.

"Danzo."

"You know?" I asked, surprised.

"It was just a guess," Shikamaru replied. "My old man kept dropping those troublesome cryptic hints about one of the elders being dangerous and that I should stay away from him and try not to catch his attention."

"My father was much the same. He believes that the disappearance of an older cousin of mine, one who was becoming fast known as prodigious in his use of kikaichu, is that man's fault." _Fu,_ I thought, _or was it Torune? I don't know which is the Yamanaka and which is the Aburame_.

"There's more to that bastard than just abductions, but that's a different topic entirely. You're only here to ask about my intentions and how they involve Naruto, correct?" Both of them sharpened at my obvious avoidance of the subject, but let it lay.

"Yeah, those were IQ tests. The question I'm asking is why you were testing us and how it has something to do with the mysteries surrounding Naruto. I would never have seen the inconsistencies surrounding him if you didn't point them out to me, the stigmas and prejudice against him had already blinded me to his situation, but why show me. It's obvious you know we're miles ahead of our peers in regards to intelligence and maturity, even among ninja children. My first guess had been that you saw these questions first and pointed them to us because you wanted help solving them, but you really didn't come off as not knowing the answers already. So the question became why show us questions that you yourself know all the answers to already? Why get us involved?" Shikamaru questioned, Shino only nodding silently in agreement with the Nara's observations.

"You're right, I do have all the answers, and the truth is so much larger than you can imagine. The other answers I have to the new questions you have are just as big. But knowing the answer is different from resolving the problem." Their eyes lit up with the revelation as they understood what I was saying.

"You want us to help Naruto." Shino stated bluntly, a hint of surprise actually clear in his voice.

"Why?" Shikamaru asked, bewildered. "Naruto's been nothing but an absolute menace to you, taunting you, trying to prank you, antagonizing you. He doesn't hide how much he hates you."

"You should know the reason why by now," I responded softly, looking away and seeing their expressions turn solemn from the corner of my eye.

"He's jealous of you. Why? Because he is hated by the village for some reason and tries hard to gain their attention, negative or not, because they try to ignore him and you have the village worshiping you with no effort on your part, attention that you clearly hold in disdain," Shino replied.

Shikamaru shook his head sadly. "He doesn't get that the reason you hate it so much is because you're in similar yet opposite positions. The village doesn't see you as an individual, rather they see you as some arbitrary figure that symbolizes the 'Last Uchiha'. Naruto...I don't know who the villagers see him as, but it's not himself since if they really saw him for who he was, they'd only see him as a mildly annoying pest, but an overall cheerful and energetic kid."

"You really don't know what they see him as? You have all the pieces of the puzzle in front of you...or maybe you refuse to see it. Is it because you don't want to believe Konoha can be so cruel?...or is it because your view is the same as the villagers?" I asked coolly, gazing intently at Shikamaru as I saw that he really did figure it out as he shook his head slowly as if trying to clear it, his expression quickly turning to one of disbelief and disgust.

"They...they can't be that unbelievably _stupid, _can they?" He breathed.

"Excuse me, I believe I am lost," Shino spoke up. I turned to him when it seemed Shikamaru was lost in his dark musings.

"You've seen how the villagers treat Naruto, yes? Like an outcast, like a criminal, like a pariah," I stated more than asked. Shino nodded in response anyways. "They call him names like monster, demon, fox brat and the like?" He nodded again, this time more slowly as the last name sparked a flame of understanding in his countenance. I added the last bit of fuel to the fire. "When is Naruto's birthday?" The way Shino silently reacted to the last piece of the puzzle, I was sure he would have staggered if he were standing.

"_Kami..._oh kami, Naruto is the holder of the kyuubi!" Shikamaru rasped, holding a hand to his head, eyes wide.

"_Jinchuuriki- _power of the human sacrifice," I murmured in reply. Both Shino and Shikamaru looked like they were going to be sick.

"The villagers...even my clan who is judged in a similar, if not much milder way, because of the kikaichu we house willingly from birth, treats him like the one he holds despite them not being the same," Shino whispered, voice rough with the inner turmoil he seemed to be experiencing. "How...how could they be so cruel?"

"It's much worse than that..." Shikamaru and Shino's head snapped up to me in disbelief.

"How-?! How can it be any worse than our entire village treating the one person keeping us safe from the kyuubi like garbage?!" Shikamaru demanded. I only looked him straight in the eye.

"Shikamaru, Shino...who was the only other person in the village that had Naruto's yellow blond hair and sky blue eyes? With those gravity defying spikes and everything...the village sees his face every day but refuse to acknowledge the truth." Shikamaru bolted to his feet, staggering as he continued holding his head, really looking sick now. Shino actually had to put a hand on the floor to keep him from swaying where he sat.

"The son...the son of the yondaime...our village has been slowly destroying the son of the man they practically worship as a god," Shino muttered in shock. Shikamaru dry heaved, putting a hand to his mouth as he kept himself from vomiting.

"How could they...how could they pass on that hate to their kids?! Can they not see their children become monsters as bad as the kyuubi?! How could they be so blind as to who his father is, no they couldn't be, Naruto's almost a carbon copy of the man. Do they see and just think it's the kyuubi taunting them. Likely. That's...they're trying to kill him!" Shikamaru suddenly blurted as everything fell into place.

"They are starving him of the attention that children our age need. He no doubt had to raise himself so he does not know how to take care of himself properly, explaining why he is the smallest of our class by a large margin," Shino observed.

"It's worse than that. Not only do they prevent him from ever being healthy, but they've been sabotaging his education. I'll bet anything that before he was in our class and being sent out because of the pranks he pulled that he was kicked out of class for stupid reasons. The pranking must have stemmed up later from his desire for attention, even if it is negative, when they started pretending he wasn't there at all." Shikamaru paled further as another realization hit him. "Does...does Naruto even know how to read and write? I've...I've never even seen him bring a pencil in to class, much less paper or books."

"The village must give him poor equipment or overcharge him for anything. Even if reading and writing were not a potential problem, simply getting daily necessities must be a losing battle," Shino put in, looking more and more disgusted as he went on.

"...this is why you tested us," Shikamaru suddenly said, obviously coming to a lot of correct conclusions. "You wanted to see if we would be smart enough, mature enough to not only discover the truth but to not be blinded by prejudice like the rest of the village. You answered our questions because you want us to help you help Naruto."

"It would indeed be suspicious if the beloved 'last Uchiha' were to suddenly take pointed interest in the village pariah. It would bring attention to the two of you that would put you in great danger, no matter the positive short term effects it could have on Naruto, in the end the two of you would be separated," Shino deduced. I nodded seriously, my face the picture of severity.

"Helping Naruto is only one step I need to take in order to accomplish one of my goals."

"And what goals would that be?" Shikamaru questioned sharply, instantly suspicious of how I portrayed Naruto as a stepping stone.

"To bring honor to the Uchiha clan name; to revive the Uchiha clan, to bring those responsible to the end of the Uchiha clan to justice; to clean out the corrupt of the Konoha power system; to rid the village of their ignorance regarding the Uchiha Clan, the Hyuga clan, the Uzumaki clan, and jinchuuriki, especially regarding the kyuubi; to help Naruto in his goal to become hokage; to raise Konoha to its former glory and return the will of fire and idealism that it was built upon under the first hokage, Senju Hashirama," I listed easily, with confidence and determination, ignoring how the two stared at me in shocked silence. "Of course a lot of those goals overlap since the way to accomplish them would clear more than one goal sometimes," I finished casually.

"You have no interest in becoming hokage yourself?" Shino questioned curiously. I only waved my hand at the question airily.

"I recognize that I'm only a soldier, not a leader. Naruto is the one that has the potential to be a hokage that Hashirama himself would be proud to call a successor. He has the right idealism, the right motivation...or at least he will once we tell him the truth of his heritage and the reason behind the village's hatred." Shikamaru scoffed at that.

"Knowing that orange wearing idiot, he'll take it as a challenge and not only conquer the kyuubi, but also work excessively hard to prove the village wrong about him...troublesome." I smirked at Shikamaru.

"I think you're underestimating the dobe. Rather than conquer the kyuubi, he's probably going to be friends with it, see it as his personal mission to get rid of the kyuubi's hatred and show him what it's like to have a friend." Shikamaru snorted at that and Shino actually chuckled.

"I almost feel sorry for the fox. He has no idea what is coming," Shino stated bluntly, making the other two laugh aloud.

*Meanwhile, in a dark cage, a large nine tailed fox gave a large sneeze in his sleep and mumbled darkly to himself, curling in on himself more tightly as a cold chill of foreboding crawled up his spine.*

* * *

><p>"Hn, dobe."<p>

"Shut up, teme! Just you wait! I'm gonna get this down before you know it and rub it in your smug face!" The hyper blond shouted angrily, his hand surprisingly slow and steady as he attempted to follow Shikamaru as he went through the more difficult kanji, having already moved past basic hiragana and kanji in just two days.

Just like I thought. Naruto really is a genius. A sponge that works better by observation and action thanks to necessity, but a genius all the same. It took a long time, much longer than the three had anticipated to both befriend and get Naruto to admit he needed help learning things so they could proceed to do so...and all on the sly. Months of encouragement, assurances of friendship, and friendly taunting that poked at his competitive spirit when it came to me. But it was well worth it.

Naruto hardly ever burst out into shouts of anger like he just did anymore. Having the acknowledgement, respect, and caring of three true friends had upped his confidence and sated his desire for attention to the point where his annoying, boisterous attitude all but disappeared, turning him into a calm, quiet, and calculating young man, making him seem that much more like his father, but definitely with his mother's temper.

I smirked as I remembered how angry and baffled all of Naruto's haters were when they saw how much more calm, mature, and strong he was in a matter of weeks. They couldn't overcharge him or give him crap goods because Naruto grew smart enough to wear a henge in all civilian shops, they couldn't catch him after pranks that were obviously done by him because he was no longer ever seen doing them or even seen at all, and most importantly, they could no longer sabotage his ninja education because either Sasuke, Shikamaru, Shino, or Chouji were always nearby when Naruto was being taught or graded so the teachers couldn't teach him or grade him incorrectly, though Chouji didn't actually know the truth about Naruto yet, he still saw Naruto as a close friend.

It was with great relief when dog boy-er, Kiba joined the group shortly after and replaced me as Naruto's rival, their competitive spirit much more similar than my own as I had almost none to speak of and couldn't consider Naruto as anything more than a younger brother the closer we became. It had been a mix of taunting from Kiba about how stupid he was and well placed comments of worry and concern from me and the others that had Naruto slowly but surely learn common sense tidbits that all children learned as they grew, things like proper dieting, common courtesy, the cues of socialization, and personal hygiene. It was a welcome boon when after learning these common and social rules that Naruto steadfastly and religiously performed them, discovering that he enjoyed things being neat and tidy, himself included, with religious zeal. He loved being clean, he loved his apartment being in immaculate shape, and thankfully, this new found cleanliness extended to his fashion sense as he almost overnight became an expert in fashion.

Along with his burgeoning education, ie his perfecting of reading and process of writing, he discovered his love of reading and solving difficult puzzles or overcoming near impossible challenges. Shikamaru was all too delighted to have a regular shogi partner in the blond, one that actually beat him on occasion and that continued to come back for more even after losing in sequence sometimes.

I couldn't help the welling of emotion I felt when I saw Naruto go confidently through some homework or a training exercise, with his new clothes, calm attitude, and confident countenance, he really had the appearance of a future hokage, the kind of person he was meant to grow up as...though maybe he would have been more childish and energetic naturally if he were raised by loving parents, but the hatred of the village had made him wiser and more mature beyond his years. It wasn't exactly a bad thing, on the contrary it would only help him later, but the way he achieved his maturity wasn't exactly the happiest of experiences.

It was fine in the end. Naruto would overcome any obstacles in his way and accomplish his goals. Soon enough The three of us can finally tell Naruto the truth and he'll only be that much more motivated to do the impossible...and I was unashamedly looking forward to that, especially when the village gets a wake up call.

* * *

><p>"I'm so sorry," I couldn't help breathing out as I stared down at the stone head of the nidaime I was standing on, my hands stuffed in my pocket and Naruto sitting proudly on the head of the yondaime, looking out at the village with a sad, small smile.<p>

"You always apologize for things that aren't your fault, Sasuke. You apologized for knocking some sense into me when I refused to acknowledge I needed help. You apologized when Kiba made a thoughtless, cruel comment about my parents after beating him up for it. You apologized for knocking me down a few pegs when I got too cocky after you guys had nothing else to teach me anymore. You apologized for the behavior of your clan in the past and the way the village treats me. And now you're apologizing for not telling me about my parents and the kyuubi sooner even though I know you kept it from me because I wasn't ready yet." He turned to me with a more genuine warm smile then. " So, I'm going to say the same thing I've said every time; _Don't apologize. It's not your fault._"

I looked away, unable to meet with those guileless, sincere eyes, Naruto's intensity much greater than it was watching through a screen or reading it in a manga. I really should have expected that, but it made me think about how I could never measure up to him, not like the original Sasuke could. Sure, the kid was fucked up in the head but he had that steel core of determination that matched Naruto's own, that intensity that drew people to them like flies. I understood _why_ Sasuke had so many fans despite being a douche, but that didn't mean I even remotely liked him myself. I had always been capable of ignoring the lures and pulls that other people had, whether they were real or fictional. That Naruto could affect me with that powerful charisma and at the same make mine feel inadequate in comparison to himself and my own predecessor was a very much bittersweet feeling.

Not that I dwelled on that very often, it was only a small portion of the inner turmoil that constantly raged within me very much in an Uchiha sense. Naruto's words invoked in me the feelings of guilt I'd carried with me since the massacre, for not being able to stop Itachi, the one Uchiha I loved, the agony of having to kill his entire family; for not being able to stop Obito from helping, for not being able to stop Danzo from desecrating the bodies and taking the eyes of my family, no matter how little I viewed them as such. I was especially angry with Danzo for taking one of Shisui's eyes, Itachi only able to save one.

"The massacre wasn't your fault either," Naruto said softly. I tensed severely at that, nearly flinching before all the tension left all at once and I sagged in defeat.

"I know...I _know _it's not. I was eight. I couldn't have done anything to stop it, no matter how much of a prodigy I was..." I smiled bitterly. " 'Survivor's guilt', something that usually only happens in shinobi that have lived through war and having seen all their friends and family die before them. That bastard therapist even implied that I was the only Uchiha to ever get survivor's guilt since the founding of Konoha," I replied bitterly, knowing that it was most likely true and hating it.

"What kind of jerk says that to an eight year old that just had his family killed!" Naruto shouted in outrage, standing quickly. I chuckled humorlessly.

"Like you said, Naruto, I was eight. I doubt he expected me to catch it." I turned back to the village with calmer eyes. "I realized he was a horrible shrink when I saw he didn't realize that I wasn't guilty for surviving. I felt guilty for _not_ feeling guilty...about them _dying_. I didn't feel guilty about not being able to save them because I never saw them as family as people who cared so I didn't care either, I was detached. I felt _horrible_, I still feel like I'm not even human when strangers come up to me and give me condolences for a loss I don't even feel. And then I feel annoyed at their kissing up to me and then turning around and treating you like they should me, with disgust and hate, when you feel stronger than anyone and it's never been anything negative. I was mad, angry, _furious_ that they paid attention to someone that so obviously wanted to be left alone, that wouldn't mind being hated and ignored and loathed the one that deserved their attention the most-" I was forcefully stopped, surprised when Naruto pulled me toward him by the black mourning scarf I wore around my neck far longer than was necessary, glaring at me.

"Don't you dare call yourself that! You're no more a monster than I am!" He yelled. Before I could be stunned to silence by his adamant words, I opened my mouth to protest.

"Whoa! If you guys are busy, we could always come back later!" Kiba interrupted in his boisterous voice, cackling as he came up, hands behind his head and Akamaru on his head. Naruto immediately paled at the implication and let go of me like I was on fire. I smirked and fixed my scarf, giving Kiba a smoldering look.

"You could always join us," I invited with a sultry smile as I sauntered over to them and leaned over him, taking advantage of the small height I had over him and stroking his chin in a way that would make Suoh Tamaki proud. Kiba went from red to white to green in record time before stumbling back and tripping over his own feet to fall back unceremoniously on his butt and making Chouji laugh as I straightened and put my hands back in my pockets, looking down at him in a true superior Uchiha fashion, with smirk and all.

"Ha, you're such a virgin," I taunted.

"You may not be a monster, but you are the farthest thing from normal with your sense of humor," Shikamaru drawled, his own lips fighting a smile as Kiba scowled and scrambled back up to his feet.

"You're a sick bastard, you know that?! And who are you calling a virgin?! You're the same age as us, bastard!" Kiba accused, pointing his finger rudely at me in a true old Naruto fashion. It seems he took the role of Sasuke for Naruto and Naruto for me. I only looked away and up in a suspicious fashion, half turning away. "WHAT?! Don't tell me you've already done it?!" Kiba yelled in shock.

"O-oi, Sasuke. Y-you haven't really done it yet have you?" Naruto asked genuinely, looking at me in half shock-half concern. "We're only eleven!" This time my suspicious actions were more sincere and less joking as I nervously shifted my eyes away from Naruto's innocent sincere ones, scratching his cheek with one finger...

"You didn't!" Kiba shouted. I shrugged shamelessly, feeling bad for shocking Naruto and feeling like I tainted his innocence. "I was curious," about how it felt for guys to have sex and I felt more like a pedophile than thinking of those teenage girls as cougars since I was mentally older than them, not that cared very much. "It got annoying after a while though because they were so clingy and needy. I told them it was just a one time thing, but they suddenly acted like they've been my girlfriend for years. You'd think for how old they were, they wouldn't be chasing around an eleven year old so desperately. It's even more irritating when they beg me not to leave and crying on me. It's gross. I don't know how many times I've had to throw away shirts because they've ruined it by clinging onto it and snot crying on them," I groused. I hadn't thought that those kinds of girls existed. I felt more disgusted than guilty. "After I was done experimenting, I got bored and more than a little annoyed with the girls that kept throwing themselves on me and stopped. I decided to wait until I established my shinobi career before trying to find a serious kunoichi to settle down with and help revive my clan," I stated. I turned, sweat-dropping as they looked at me in awe as if I was being haloed by light and standing on a pedestal.

"...you seemed so lofty and distant for a moment that you appeared far above us for just an instant," Shino answered my unasked question when the others just remained gawking at him silently.

"B-but, isn't it a crime for older people to-to do _that _with minors?!" Naruto shrieked almost like a girl. I looked at him in amusement.

"It's called _sex, _Naruto. You're not a five year old girl. And that law is a lot more lax in ninja villages since registered ninja are considered adults as soon as they become genin, so academy students are turned a blind eye to if they're in a relationship with an older man or woman, even more so if their partner is a mentor or teacher. The only time it's enforced is if they can see it's not mutual and that should be easy enough for any decent ninja to tell. Besides that, I have the perk of being the technical head of my clan and having the village constantly trying to kiss up to me. The elders would sooner offer their own granddaughters to appease me than to arrest me or anyone I get involved with. Whatever makes the 'last Uchiha' happy and loyal to the village after all," I smirked bitterly as I turned back to the sight of the village.

"...the most disturbing part of that statement is that you're probably right," Shikamaru muttered.

"That's not anything new, is it Shika?" I replied with a cocky smirk. Shikamaru scoffed as the others laughed at the response.

"Cocky as always, Sasuke," Kiba smirked.

"No, that would be you dog-breath. I can actually back up my bark with bite."

"Why you!" Kiba growled, making the others start laughing as we began to banter back and forth in a very Naruto-verse fashion.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: <strong>So here it is. Yet another story I couldn't shake off despite all the unfinished stories I have already. This one I'm aiming for 10,000 words per chapter at least. The pairing for Sasuke has already been decided and I would be exceedingly amazed if anyone were to guess right as it's a very obscure character that has no role in the main plot line, something I chose on purpose so as to be able to write her however I want without having to actually create an entirely new character. Very convenient. Not sure when I'll introduce her so don't expect anything outrageously soon. The other pairings might also be with characters just as obscure as Sasuke's or actually be obvious, depending on the character, but I'm still a bit undecided. They will, however, be practical so their partners being from other villages will be highly unlikely and the age gap most likely won't be large at all. There is also little to no chance of any of the characters having harems or reverse harems. The most I might do is a three way relationship but that's unlikely.

Well, anyways, thanks for reading and reviews are welcome, hope some of you liked it. (=u=)


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